|
|
| Don't fight 'em, LUVEM |
| By Caterina Spinaris |
| Published: 02/18/2008 |
Corrections staff are experts at containing incarcerated individuals within correctional facilities and managing frustrated offenders. Just as important for the staff’s well-being is the ability to contain and manage conflict that builds between them and coworkers or family members.How can conflict management be done professionally and skillfully? When confronted by someone or when in disagreement with them, our first urge is to try to overpower them. We try to prevail in the argument and convince our opponent that we are right and they are wrong. However, conflict management experts advocate that when disagreeing with others, we need to do less “convincing” and more listening to them and “thinking together” about the problem at hand. There are several reasons for that. One is that if we try to overpower a person and force them to accept our view, we have just made an enemy. This guarantees that we will continue experiencing problems with that person in the future. Another reason for listening and discussing an issue is based on the assumption that all parties involved in a disagreement have some validity in their perspective. Therefore all parties can make worthwhile contributions toward managing conflict. A third reason for working at listening well and thinking together is that these two activities are likely to provide us with the necessary data to come up with the best solutions possible. The LUVEM tool described below for conflict de-escalation and management was presented in part in two prior installments. ( Are you really listening?, 5/29/07 and All you need is LUV, 9/17/07 ). This third installment adds to the prior ones and ties them all together. LUVEM stands for Listen, Understand, Validate, Explain, and Maintain. LISTEN Listening aims to:
Listening is done by:
Effective conflict de-escalation requires understanding the other party’s thinking process, perspective, fundamental presuppositions, prior experiences with the issue, and what they consider “sacred” and non-negotiable. Therefore while listening try to understand the other party’s point of view, emotions, motives, needs, and difficulties. VALIDATE To express your understanding to the other party convincingly, validate them. Stay away from put downs and criticism, and point out even a kernel of wisdom, truth or usefulness in the other party’s perspective, requests, choices or behavior. Validating does not necessarily mean “accepting,” “agreeing with” or “condoning.” It is based on the ability to empathize—to put ourselves in the other person’s situation and look at the world through their eyes. The following are some examples of validating statements:
EXPLAIN After listening, understanding to the best of your ability and validating, you have increased your chances that when it is your turn to present your side of the issue, the other party will listen. So now it is your turn to explain, your goals for the discussion—what you aim to accomplish through talking with the other party; your position—your perspective of the situation; your objections to the other person’s conduct (if applicable); what you are willing to do on your end regarding the situation; what you request from the other party and why. For example, to ask for changes in someone’s behavior, you can use the following “recipe.” When you do ____, I/we/our team gets impacted in the following ways: _________. And what I need for you to do instead is _______. The benefits of that to you/the team will be _______. If you choose not to make those changes, then the negative consequences will be ______. Usually after you explain your position you will need to do some more listening, understanding and validating of the other party before you can proceed. MAINTAIN Throughout the exchange it is vital to contain your emotional reactions and respond professionally to maintain a creative problem-solving focus, which promotes thinking outside of the box to find solutions to challenges affecting both parties, and a respectful attitude, communicating that the other party is worthy of respect even if their premises are fundamentally different from yours. Containing emotional reactions is also important in order to remain optimistic about finding a solution, and to keep a considerate attitude about of the legitimate interests of all parties involved. “Win-win” solutions are more likely to be implemented and to last for longer periods of time compared to approaches that favor one party at the expense of the other. So, next time you have a run-in with another staff member, or with a loved one at home, remember to LUVEM! Containing the intensity of a disagreement and managing a fiery conflict with finesse is more than worth it. (www.desertwaters.com) , a Colorado nonprofit corporation dedicated to the well-being of corrections staff and their families. |
The main course is for over 7s but they also run a Zap Zone especially designed to give under 7s a similar gaming experience but with sized down equipment and of course a lower age range throughout. This is only available for party packages however, so you need an excuse. Any one will do!Car Recovery Birmingham Cheap Car Recovery Leeds Breakdown Recovery Manchester Breakdown Recovery Services Car Breakdown Recovery
Get Orignal Instagram Likes On Your Instagram Photo,Videos
https://lil.ink/71314 http://www.xn--277c.com/26779 http://ralive.de/50676 http://tropaadet.dk/54205 http://wntdco.mx/17997 http://rih.co/52360 http://rih.co/24801 http://perkele.ovh/16330 http://jnl.io/79649 http://goto.iamaws.com/39408 https://arill.us/53235 https://xxs.yt/52323 https://aaa.moda/47528 http://wntdco.mx/65555 http://corta.co/99714 http://ralive.de/57228 http://wntdco.mx/66527 https://lil.ink/75299 http://awalsh.com/36111 http://www.short4free.us/62542 http://www.short4free.us/72427 http://awalsh.com/97266 http://valeriemace.co.uk/76880 http://www.lookweb.it/93843 https://atho.me/3Tcc http://jnl.io/86021 http://www.short4free.us/83549 http://www.short4free.us/76124 http://www.short4free.us/10109 http://yourls.site/86504 https://e13.co/88265 http://yourls.site/24694 http://999.sh/50622 http://goto.iamaws.com/58582 http://999.sh/33968 http://www.vkvi.net/79136 http://tropaadet.dk/93023 http://awalsh.com/82861 http://wntdco.mx/71814 http://goto.iamaws.com/63412 http://ralive.de/40784 http://webhop.se/95081 http://awalsh.com/36414 http://www.short4free.us/46073 http://perkele.ovh/73402 https://xxs.yt/52849 http://www.abcagency.se/50957 http://perkele.ovh/49671 http://www.abcagency.se/67566 http://tans.me/67971 http://www.xn--277c.com/33959 http://www.vkvi.net/32570 http://ralive.de/75811 https://tinyurl.com/yalfvf9s http://tropaadet.dk/15598 http://freest.at/72314 https://atho.me/3SNH http://webhop.se/67750 http://www.short4free.us/36113 http://valeriemace.co.uk/57241 http://tropaadet.dk/18873 http://tans.me/26988 https://aaa.moda/40980 http://www.short4free.us/73768 http://valeriemace.co.uk/87877 http://valeriemace.co.uk/14023 http://www.short4free.us/38828 https://aaa.moda/19185 http://ralive.de/46500 http://ralive.de/84475 http://jnl.io/14428 http://www.short4free.us/94026 http://webhop.se/63273 http://webhop.se/58363 https://aaa.moda/43031 https://lil.ink/66825 http://corta.co/60670 http://perkele.ovh/48735 http://webhop.se/21875 http://www.abcagency.se/52280 http://ralive.de/45185 http://rih.co/24895 http://www.short4free.us/52939 http://rih.co/79208 https://aaa.moda/14729 https://atho.me/3SOl http://wntdco.mx/73315 http://corta.co/72020 http://www.vkvi.net/64935 http://valeriemace.co.uk/57587 http://www.short4free.us/41262 http://www.vkvi.net/28558 http://freest.at/61928 http://goto.iamaws.com/53466 http://webhop.se/63592 http://tropaadet.dk/64098 http://valeriemace.co.uk/27422 https://xxs.yt/49753 http://tropaadet.dk/60616 https://arill.us/38946
clb20181103
michael kors
kyrie 4
birkenstock uk
coach outlet online
ecco shoes for women
nike air max 90
coach outlet online
nike outlet online
cheap oakley sunglasses
nike outlet store
christian louboutin shoes
toms shoes
coach factorty outlet store
canadian goose jacket
cheap jordans free shipping
converse outlet
canada goose outlet
nike shox shoes
louboutin shoes
kate spade handbags
gucci outlet online
ugg outlet online
astros jerseys
ecco outlet
michael kors outlet
michael kors outlet online
cheap jordan shoes
christian louboutin shoes
pandora charms outlet
birkenstock sale
canada goose jackets
toms outlet store
michael kors outlet clearance
discount oakley sunglasses
adidas outlet online
cheap jordans
coach outlet online
ugg outlet online
louboutin outlet
christian louboutin shoes
adidas store
nike air presto
kate spade outlet online
coach factory outlet online
coach outlet canada
nike outlet store
coach factory outlet
canada goose outlet store
gucci outlet online
true religion jeans
true religion outlet store
louis vuitton handbags
ugg boots outlet
uggs outlet
durant shoes
nmd adidas
pandora outlet
coach factory outlet online
pandora charms sale clearance
oakley sunglasses outlet
coach outlet
cheap air jordans
tory burch outlet online
fitflop sandals
michael kors outlet online
michael kors outlet store
pandora jewelry
ugg boots outlet
polo ralph lauren outlet online
polo ralph lauren
fendi handbags
yeezy boost 350
kate spade outlet online
coach outlet store
coach canada
coach factorty outlet store
kate spade outlet online
coach outlet store online
timberland shoes
indians jerseys
nike shoes
kate spade bags
jimmy choo
uggs outlet
coach outlet online
ecco outlet
jordan shoes
jimmy choo shoes
michael kors outlet store
ugg outlet store
coach outlet
uggs outlet
adidas yeezy shoes
timberland boots outlet
nike sneakers
coach outlet online
coach factorty outlet online
ralph lauren sale
fitflop uk
birkenstock outlet
uggs outlet
dr martens boots
moncler outlet store
braves jerseys
hermes bags
kate spade bags
rolex replica watches
timberland shoes
uggs outlet store
pandora charms outlet
kate spade handbags
ugg boots
ugg outlet
canada goose outlet store
mlb jerseys cheap
philipp plein
uggs outlet online
fitflops sale
timberland outlet
pandora rings
adidas nmd r1
nfl jerseys
adidas ultra boost