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| The Public's Use of Anger Management is Increasing in the U.S. and Canada |
| By George Anderson |
| Published: 07/30/2012 |
The effectiveness of Evidenced Based Anger Management Classes have resulted in the inclusion of anger management classes in most At Risk Youth Programs and Reentry Programs for persons returning to their communities following incarceration. This new trend is occurring in the U.S. and Canada
Generally, when we think of anger management we tend to think of aggressive males who are physically violent and, as a result are mandated to attend anger management classes by Court Order as a result of person or property directed violence or aggression. In reality, most clients of Anger Management Programs are men and women who are mandated to attend anger management coaching by their workplace Human Resource Managers. HR Referrals are related to the prevention of workplace violence, hostile work environment or workplace tension. The second most common referral source of anger management clients is actually from spouses or significant others who are concerned over their partners' lack of social awareness or poor communication skills or lack of empathy or compassion. Many participants are self-referrals who recognize the need for professional assistance. Monster. COM is one of the largest employment agencies in the world. In recognition of the importance of skills in emotional intelligence for success in many jobs such as sales, executives, customer services and other positions where interpersonal relationships are keys to success, Monster. COM is now advising job applicants to personally take Emotional Intelligence Assessments prior to being interviewed. This goal is to provide the job applicant with information regarding his or her blind spots and deficits in many EQ skills. Finally, there is now a dramatic increase of volunteer referrals from persons, such as parents, who have become aware that they often exhibit a lack of patience, lack of empathy, assertive communication, poor stress management skills or a lack of competence in creating win win situations in interpersonal relationships. In Summary, the current trends in anger management referrals are primarily related to the public's recognition of the need and value of opportunities for skill enhancement in self-awareness, self-control, social awareness, relationship management, assertive communication, stress management, empathy and impulse control. The current focus of most anger management programs in the U.S. are actually based on emotional intelligence skill enhancement. All of these programs are non-psychiatric and include Emotional Intelligence Assessments such as the internationally recognized Bar On EQi 2.0 Emotional Intelligence Assessment that can be taken on-line. In order to coach for skill enhancement in Emotional Intelligence, client workbooks, DVDs, videos as well as a wide variety of skill building exercises are essential. Generally, these courses are provided individually in a coaching format or in small groups. George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CEAP. CAMF Diplomate, American Association of Anger Management Providers |
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He has blue eyes. Cold like steel. His legs are wide. Like tree trunks. And he has a shock of red hair, red, like the fires of hell. His antics were known from town to town as he was a droll card and often known as a droll farceur. Hamilton Lindley with his madcap pantaloon is a zany adventurer and a cavorter with a motley troupe of buffoons.
Correction: sorry One may "resent" the governor because that individual who "resents" a politician more than "the Joker' is probably "more" aware of the accumulative consequences that the governor could accomplish through his political power who "robs his constituents" on a "perpetual basis" and "enables" his friends (really fiends) to do the same.
There were two thieves on the cross. One was honest.
It is interesting that the governor "stuffing his friend's" pockets mentioned earlier in this discussion is probably a "sycophant" and the Joker (a psychopath) that is "going on trial" recently for what he did are both very dangerous individuals but only one "appears" to care about the public in order to "save them" from an unknown enemy through feeling or emotion that may or may not exist at all in reality. The "collateral damage" in the long run as far as the "unintended consequences" may appear to be less at first glance because one is merely "nice" governor. We could call "the governor" who is a "thief" in reality" less dangerous than the Joker. One may "resent" politicians and "resent" the governor because that person who "resents" politicians less than the Joker is probably more aware of the accumulative consequences that the governor could accomplish through his political power who "robs his constituents" on a "perpetual basis" and "enables" his friends (really fiends) to do the same. Eventually the influence of Gov could run a whole state into the ground economically and the children will starve. This dude as his philosophies multiplies could be a spore of the Keynes type who would enable real disaster and even cause wars on a mass scale around the globe. One must choose who is the most emotionally damaged individual and more dangerous. Resenting either is a trap which can cause one to take on the same personality (and ideology) as the abuser. This is called the Stockholm Syndrome. What if a male "resents" his mother and wakes up one morning finding he now wants to get a sex change by resenting her? Resentment can cause all sorts of strange behavior patterns. Letting go of resentment (false judgment) is the root of all addictions and frees one to choose his own life rather than than being a chip off the old block of mom or the Gov.
Many people believe that just because a drug is not used in the psychological community that it is not psychiatric. This is not true. All mental illness boils down to wrong beliefs. We become what we believe. Some project their beliefs into another by empathy that clearly states that the personality of the one doing the projecting is putting their thoughts and beliefs into the target. How one puts their beliefs into another and the "washing of the brain" can be done in two ways. One way is Pavlov’s dog or behavioral science. Pavlov’s dog is pressure teaching that offers rewards or punishments. Words put the mind asleep and imprinting occurs. Words can be a drug if the recipient is pressured, therefore the washing of the brain cannot occur without pressure. Pressure can be used through intimidation or puffing one up interchangeably. When words are used with a wrong spirit or ideology it is not only the words one uses but it is the ideology behind the word. A correct ideology wakes one up out of a hypnotic state because conscience will verify that truth and eliminate inner conflict. A wrong ideology can put one to sleep by rote teaching techniques. Therefore it is not the words or the tests that are the problem but the agenda. Do the words pressure or do they free the individual to think for themselves? The difference between a psychologist and a psychiatrist is that the latter is a legal drug dealer. Many drugs get rid of symptoms of rebellion, but not the "disease." Where wrong beliefs are projected one will remain ill at ease or diseased. Drugs can hinder the disease from being cured as the causal factor is suppressed. Therefore the right meditation cures one from looking to people for his esteem. One must get up in the morning and get their meditation, rather than medication. The latter is very dangerous indeed. False teaching itself is dangerous. Words are not realities. It is interesting here to note that those in the medical profession do not share this truth. If someone calls me a monster as a former offender, that does not offend me since I know their judgment may be based on rote teaching that is not fact-based but feeling-based. The person uses that word “monster” with a wrong motive for political purposes and most everyone with an I.Q. above a dog knows that statement is not true (monster). If I call someone "fat" the feeling-based individual (generally a democrat) responds from a hypnotic state and they are sensitive to words. Why would I be offended at the person in his state of mind? Since words are not realities but are subjective and based on feeling, one should not react to such foolish individuals at the top of the pyramid in the system. We must let that roll off of us like water off a duck's back because they know not what they do. Now if I am fat, it is generally an addiction. All addictions are bad and rooted in resentment based in fear. Therefore if one is a drunk, and someone who has succeeded in giving up alcohol and one tells another that alcohol is not good for them, that is a good thing. If people agree with the truth that all addiction (and I can prove that) is due to being obsessed with a person, place, or image, then we have a starting point. Right meditation removes anger and resentment, and therefore does not cover the illness but allows pain to do the perfect work. Pain is a friend, but when psychiatrists perpetually keep one in a drugged state it may bring peace to the collective, but it can destroy the patient from being healed by facing himself, the pain, and his Creator. The pain that he suffers is his conscience or the hounds of heaven chasing him down. True meditation not based on outcome goals or agendas clears the conscience so that those hounds do not have to run so hard. Ambition can be used to keep one running ahead of reality.
When I started working for Black & Decker in Maryland it was as a temp. I would come in early to the job site and set things up. Everyone knew I had a criminal record, but the company showed me great respect. I started out at seven dollars and worked my way up to almost thirteen in a few years. Those on top were secretly transferring many to South Carolina. They already knew that most of Black & Decker would go overseas, but they deceived those of us at the bottom. I had made my job a "god" and too important and got "fearful" with the thought that an ex criminal would never get another job as good as that. The deceivers at the top "made me get disturbed," and they told me my machine operators' job was not going overseas. It did. They had to send me to anger management, because I had exposed their plan. They were angry with me, but I reacted out of fear. That made ME look like I had the problem. This is the way it works. The company was using deceit, I reacted and looked like I was the deceiver. As usual I was honest, and they were lying. New management had taken over just prior to this. They didn't even know me from Maryland and South Carolina. I lost hundreds of dollars in pay, and I had to go to a psychologist, and she was great. I told her about my background, and she understood completely. Well, one thing led to another, and sex offender registries entered the conversation. She thought the data and these laws inhibited restoration. The reason I reacted when the company lied was because I was resenting the stupidity of political individuals so I took it out on the liars in front of me. I was strong before the weak in my own mind, so the innocence of Black & Decker who had looked out for me had now become my enemy in my own mind. I was scapegoating and didn't even know it. Eventually, the registries pushed me out of my nice apartment in South Carolina, and I was forced to buy land in Virginia in order to survive. Everything was working for my benefit spiritually and to have my needs provided with no action on my part. The only thing I had to deal with was my reactions. Reactions are a bigger part of life than our choices or goals. Goals can be a setup if the outcome based agenda does not transpire. I don't believe in goals, because they are always a setup. Outcome-based goals cause stress when the manifestation of those goals do not transpire. If one reacts properly by dealing with life on life's terms, that is an asset. To set goals is to set one's self up to respond in a wrong way when things don't go our way or get puffed up when they do go our way. In another words, we are not animals. Animals respond the way they are intended to, and they do what the food chain demands. We are people, and we respond unconsciously by what was put in us. We have allowed trauma to run our lives, and that trauma if unchecked will continue the damage. Stress is good, because it can heal if handled in a right way, or it can kill. I choose to heal by not judging others and to search my heart and mind so I don't treat my wife as if she is the enemy. Those that are not healed are strong before the weak, and weak before the strong. When I try to play "god" and control outside circumstances, I wind up knowing how much of a "dog" I have become. This is the first awareness that is a prerequisite to true healing.
There is a right meditation and a wrong meditation just as there is the crusades of Christendom and true Christianity. One involves self will and the other allows us to cease from our own works.
The meditation is not to change the world, but to change how you respond to circumstances. Healthy responses to life by non-reactive attitudes to outward circumstances put a shield of protection around a person. Lack of negative response to stress creates good health. To think that one can control outside based circumstances and the habits of others is an illness. The secret power of meditation is that by letting go of resentment, one can accept life on life's terms. This does not mean one must be passive, but it does mean that one can be in defense mode or run away or respond in an assertive mode. I could turn the cheek without resentment or punch a person out, and then take him out for coffee afterward. It is a matter of doing what is right in one's own heart and not empowering others to ruin your day due to their retardation or feebleness. The meditation is not done to make one feel better but to see the issue within us, and it will bubble to the surface. Just the other day I complained to my wife about all the work I had to do on my property, cutting grass, weeds, doing dishes, as she worked at Subway and I was whining. I did my meditation the next morning and a man knocked at my door and told me that yesterday, one of my best friends was found deceased with his weed whacker lying next to him on the ground. My attitude the next day was that I enjoyed the weed whacking on my own land. His death didn't bother me because I had no control over those circumstances. Had I thought that life was not fair, I would have had a miserable day the day he died. It is a matter of not letting external forces or the attitudes of others be projected at us as if we were the problem. Meditation creates a shield and sensitivity to people, places, and things diminishes over time. If one remains truly calm while others try pulling our strings or pushing our buttons, it will come back on them. The night before my friend died, I got angry with my wife for being right. How stupid can one be? Realizing how stupid I was for letting my wife control me through my wrong response in my own denial made me laugh, and I became quite happy.
So I haven't gotten my pay raises for the last three years because of my bitterness and resentment? Wow... and all this time I thought it was because the retard in the governors' chair was to busy stuffing his and his friends pockets. Maybe I should meditate and start a drum circle to cure all the worlds "human" issues.
Meditate, Let go of resentment.Give your problem over to your higher power and later you will be able to see that "you" were the real issue by your response. !00 percent of human problems are caused by bitterness and resentment. Right meditation cuts way down on physical ailments also. Do not turn your "kid" over to Total transformation. He may be on the outside what you as a parent are on the inside by your responses in anger. Some conform to anger and make it as a source of their ambition and some rebel and make it in prison but both will die and their names will be forgotten and both will push up daisies.